I’ve been having realistic dreams. Last night, I dreamed that I decided to give my dog Teddy away because I was sick and couldn’t care for him. I was anguished over it, but I knew it was the right thing to do.
Months later, I started getting better. I was walking every day plus I wondered how much of a burden I’d given the family with the two small boys, to have to take care of a dog as well, even a wonderful dog like Teddy. I drove up to their house and stopped by. The house was a mess. The boys were loud. Teddy was lying on his bed in the corner of the living room. I just blurted it out to my friend, “I don’t know how bonded you are to Teddy, but I’m better and I want him back in case you’re looking for a way out.” I didn’t want to cry so I made an excuse to go to the vet to check out something in Buddy’s files.
When I got back, Buddy was pulling a rag with the toddler sitting on it. He was laughing like crazy and Teddy, though he was pulling with his teeth, grinned as he pulled the boy around a recliner. The bigger boy ran circles around them. My friend worked in the open kitchen making dinner, something with chicken and garlic. It smelled delicious. Their dad, however, sat stiffly in an upright chair by the dining table.
Before I sat down, he said, “You can’t have him back. I walk him every morning before work and every night before bed. We’ve done all your work while you were sick. I’m glad you’re better now, but you just can’t have him.” Then, he relaxed a little. I noticed that he looked more trim than he had been when I dropped Teddy off. Back then, he had looked dubious and tired and annoyed, and chubby. He held my gaze but he didn’t say anything more. Then, he looked down at his boys who were both piled on top of Teddy. Teddy rolled onto his back and was pretending to wrestle, his mouth open and teeth showing. I’d seen him do the same thing with puppies at the dog park.
It dawned on me that this reluctant man loved my dog. He was the one who walked him at dusk and again in the dark after the boys were in bed. He had watched and probably joined in with his two boys to play with the dog. The yellow rag sat abandoned on the floor, ragged at the edges but still big enough for a boy to sit on. This was a whole family that needed Teddy and he needed them too.
I called him over and held out my hand, “Come here, Baby Dog.” He separated from the pile of boys and came to me, looking back to them. He put his head on my shoulder and I hugged him but when I let go, he went back to the boys and laid down between them. Four little hands buried themselves into his fur.
I looked back at their dad, “You’re right. It’ll be hard to let him go, but I can see he’s happy here.”
My friend, with hot steam curling her hair, said, “You can come visit. Just call ahead next time.” I nodded. Before I could cry, I got up and left.
I woke up and lolled about in my bed for a while. It felt more like a memory than a dream. I think my new meds do that. But…
Do you believe in reincarnation?
Thank you for listening, jules