Yesterday, I felt like I had a small but precious life and I was grateful to have it. I promised myself I’d keep trying no matter how hard things were. I believed that even though all I managed to do was make pizza, my life was worth something. I kept thinking of the infinite moments between seconds. I kept thinking of the infinitely small and the vastness I could find in my imagination. It was intricate and stretched through time and space. It examined the song of a nebula. Yesterday, I wondered if infinitely small is the same infinite as infinitely big.
Today, I just feel like I can’t do anything, so my life is useless. I’m going to go sit upstairs on my couch and read a book all day or worse, watch TV. What good is reading a book if I don’t live life differently because it mattered? What’s the value in a life of watching TV? [Laughtrack.] In ten minutes, it won’t matter what I wrote on social media while I was watching TV. [Laughtrack.] This morning, I got an email that my domain would be renewed in ten days if I didn’t email back saying I didn’t want it. [Laughtrack.] I get ten emails a day from people and companies that want me to spend my money on them. [Laughtrack.] TV interrupts itself to remind me to spend my money on them. [Laughtrack.] Or maybe it’s the other way around that TV interrupts its plea for me to spend my money on them to show me something they think will hold me on that same frequency. [Laughtrack.] The only thing in my life that seems to matter is that I can still spend money. [Laughtrack.]
Thank you for listening, jules
[Laughtrack.]